Such a powerfully terrifying word.
Entirely elusive in its very nature…and yet completely attainable. While reserved for the strong, there are no restrictions on anyone’s ability to find strength enough to reach it. At the same time, you must endeavor to find that strength in order to find the strength…
So here I am left on this undeniably painful path to recovery. Recovery from the past, the present and simply recovery from life, which has left me questioning why (or how) some are able to find themselves “healed” while others are simply moving through this world in a state of pure survival rather than truly living.
Of course, this questioning has also led me to a path of discovery. If I can find the answer to the why (or how) then I can find my way to that all too sought after feeling of being healed. That all too sought after peace.
In light of everything, here is what I have found during my ongoing journey…
Healing is not family…not to me anyway. Instead, healing has been finding family in friends that I would trust with my life. It is not being perfect, but find perfections with my imperfections. It is not ignoring, disguising or remaining in denial of my past, but accepting everything while gathering the strength to continue moving forward. It is not about hiding emotional or physical scars, but instead wearing them as a badge of honor as they should be.
Healing is not about apologizing for past mistakes, but learning as we were meant to. It is about acknowledging and accepting my own humanity, while always striving to be better. It is not allowing myself to be mistreated out of fear of not deserving more, but demanding that I be treated as I should be. As we all should be for we are all worthy.
But most importantly…healing is a process. It is not a place to be. It is not a goal to achieve. It is continuous. Ongoing. Something that requires work and perfection in order to heal from each struggle that life throws our way…because it will always throw something our way.
After all…life would be boring with nothing to fight for. It would leave us with limited opportunities to grow.
So I am grateful for the immense opportunities I have been blessed with to allow my soul to grow in unfounded ways, for healing is recognizing these blessings in things appearing otherwise.
And of course…the art of healing is finding a good therapist. 🙂